


god, send me your strength

by musicalawakening



Category: Spring Awakening - Sheik/Sater
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friends to Lovers, M/M, catholic school gays, ernst is a dork and doesn’t know how to act, hanschen is the hot new kid at school
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-10-20 02:53:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17614061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicalawakening/pseuds/musicalawakening
Summary: hanschen is a new boy at st. cecilia’s catholic cchool, coming in at the beginning of junior year. ernst can’t control himself.





	1. I don’t speak broke

Ernst walked into school on the first day, with his uniform all straight and nice. He was wearing a St. Cecilia’s burgundy sweater with his white collared shirt underneath, some black school shorts, his white socks (with doodled rainbows on them) and his fancy catholic school Sperry's. Right when his friends saw him, they all came running up to him and hugged him. 

Melchior right away snatched his schedule to look at what teachers he had, and Moritz clung onto Melchior as Georg and Otto scanned Ernst’s neat self. The other boys had their a few of their buttons unbottoned on their shirts, messy hair, etc. Ernst was the only one who surprisingly looked sane. 

“You look so... Catholic. Jesus.” Georg mumbled, pulling on Ernst’s sleeve which was too long for his arms. Oversized sweaters were his brand. Georg scoffed, then Melchior shoved his schedule back into his hands. Poor Ernst was so overwhelmed already. “Ernst is the only kid in this school who’s actually deadass Catholic. Even though he sucks dick on his free time. You sure you aren’t atheist?” Melchior mumbled, making Ernst flush. 

Melchior took his backpack off his shoulder, leaving Moritz to say hi to a Ernst. Once they did, Melchior flashed a small white box, then the top flipped open. “They’re called AirPods, Ernst. They’re so fucking amazing.” Melchior hummed, showing them off before putting them away and putting his backpack back on. “They’re better with wires. You don’t loose track of them.” Moritz mumbled, staring at his boyfriend in disbelief. “Shush. AirPods are good. Georg has them too!” 

Georg shrugged, and Otto gently hit him even though he could never be mean to his boyfriend. That mad Ernst realize he, out of all of the boys in front of him, were single. “Well.. I don’t like them. I agree with Moritz.” Ernst giggled, and high-fived Moritz. Right after that, he saw Ilse and Wendla running towards them. 

Wendla looked like Ernst, with the sweater and collared shirt except she wore a short black skirt and Ilse was just wearing a long sleeve white button up with a black skirt too, but she always talks about how much she hates it. They both hugged him, and Ernst smiled. He loved these girls. Ilse, Wendla, and Melchior were all weird together though because of a situation with Wendla and Melchior back in sophomore year. 

“Hi, Ernie! Junior year is about to slap, am I right?” Wendla cheered, and Ilse laughed at her girlfriends choice of slang. “Hi, Ernst.” Ilse smiled, then ruffled his hair. It was already a little messy anyways, but with a little water it should be fine. “Does anyone have Latin for first period?” Ernst asked, and nobody except Melchior raised their hand. “Mm. That’ll do, I guess.” Ernst mumbled, and everyone started laughing except for Melchior, who seemed genuinely hurt.

The bell rung for all of them to get to their classes, and they all said bye and Ernst and Melchior started walking together. “Just so you know, I’m probably going to get all the answers from you. I’m too lazy.” Ernst said, and Melchior just laughed and shrugged. “Everyone always takes my answers, so it’s fine.” Melchior hummed back.

When they got to class, Ernst took a seat towards the back and Melchior decided to sit next to him since he was gonna ace this class anyways. Ernst pulled out his phone to scroll through Twitter, then when he heard Melchior snicker from next to him he picked up his head to look at the front of the classroom. In walked a tan boy, maybe a little shorter than him, with blonde hair, glasses and fucking AirPods. He was so gorgeous though, Ernst had to look.

“Oh my god. Someone with taste in this goddamn school. Finally!” Melchior cheered, and when the blonde boy sat in front of Ernst his eyes went wide and he turned to Melchior next to him, who just smirked and tapped the blonde boys shoulders. “Hey, blondie. I see you have taste.” Melchior said, and the blonde laughed. That’s when Ernst realized he had dimples and green eyes. Fuck.

“Mhm. I don’t speak broke.” The blonde boy said, then he held out his hand for Melchior to shake. God damn it, he was probably a fuckboy. Probably straight, too. “I’m Hanschen Rilow. I’m new.” “Hm. Melchior Gabor. That’s Ernst Robel.” Melchior said, and Ernst’s face immediately flushed before making eye contact with Hanschen, who looked at him and smiled so sweetly Ernst could probably melt. 

“Hi, Ernst. Do you have AirPods?” Hanschen asked, and Ernst just shook his head and stuttered over his words. “I- I- Uh..” “Sorry, Ernst Robel. I don’t think we can be friends because you’re broke.” Hanschen said and turned back around, and Ernst just giggled before looking back at Melchior. Melchior shot him a look that basically said ‘I know you wanna fuck him’ and Ernst just took a deep breath and turned back around to pay attention. 

Ernst noticed Hanschen was wearing a long white sleeve button up with bracelets, black shorts, white socks that went to the middle of his shin and his shoes. His buttons were unbuttoned a little at the top, and that made Ernst want to die. He really didn’t know what he was doing. As class went on and everyone was introduced to what they would be doing for the rest of the semester and the rules, Ernst thought. He was very excited for the end of school, because that meant the first drama meeting of the year.


	2. Center-stage man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ernst goes through the school day seeing the same face a few times over and over. when he thinks he finally has a break after school, it shows up again.   
> -  
> some new kiddos are introduced!

Ernst sighed as the bell rung for the next class, and he put all his things in his backpack and stood up, slinging it over his shoulder. Hanschen was already walking out, and Ernst sighed and turned to Melchior, who just scoffed. 

“Melchior, shut up! He’s really hot.” Ernst whined, watching Melchior shrug and lean closer to him to talk. “And he doesn’t speak broke. Might as well give up now.” Melchior said, then started walking away. That left Ernst there, sighing to himself and walking out of the classroom to his math period, where he had Georg, Wendla, and Ilse.

When Ernst walked in, he saw Wendla sitting on a desk with a Georg braiding her hair, and Ilse talking to them. “Oh my god. Why is your face so red?!” Wendla exclaimed, cutting off whatever Ilse was saying. The other two turned their direction to him, and they both smiled. “T-There’s this new kid. He’s so hot.” Ernst said, his voice quiet. But that didn’t stop them from gasping and trying to get the details. 

“Explain him.” Georg said, taking his hands away from Wendla’s hair and leaning on her side instead. “Uh.. blonde. Tan. Green eyes and glasses. He was a little shorter than me, though.” “Doesn’t seem cute to me.” Ilse shrugged, looking down at her nails. “That’s because you’re a lesbian! He was gorgeous.” Ernst fought, and Georg nodded. “Sounds cute, not gonna whole ass lie.” 

Ernst nodded, then went to his seat and sat down. The next class he had was History, which he had with Moritz, Martha and Anna. When he got in class he saw the three in the back talking, and he joined them and hugged them, then leaned against a desk and listened to their conversation. Someone caught his eye and he looked, and it was Hanschen. But this time without the AirPods.

“Hey, Ernst.” Hanschen said and smiled, then he stood next to him and hummed. “Hi! U-Uh, this is Moritz, Martha and Anna.” Ernst said, pointing to his friends. Hanschen waved and introduced himself, then he whispered something in Ernst’s ear which caught him totally off guard. “Is Anna single?” Hanschen whispered, and Ernst just laughed and shook his head. “No, she’s dating Martha. But she’s bi, so you have a chance.” Ernst whispered back.

Hanschen just shrugged and nodded, smiling a little. He sat down in the desk next to the one Ernst was leaning on, so Ernst just sat down next to him. When the end of class came, Hanschen just flashed him a smile and walked out. Then, Martha and Anna came walking to his desk and giggled. “Yes, he’s cute. I don’t know him enough to like him though.” Ernst mumbled, then they nodded before he walked out. 

His next class was Science with Thea and Otto, and he talked to them a few times before it was over. Then his next period was lunch. He had lunch with most of his friends, and he hoped Hanschen had the same lunch as them. He knew his friends would like him. 

When they got there, they all got their lunch and sat down where they sat last year, a long table around the back of the cafeteria. Ernst sat inbetween Georg and Martha, who meant he was in between couples. As he took a bite of a strawberry, he saw Hanschen standing up and looking around. He made eye contact with him and gestured for him to come to the table, then he moved over so Hanschen could sit in between him and Georg.

“Hi. These are all of my stupid friends, b-but I think you’ll like them.” Ernst smiled as Hanschen sat down, and Hanschen smiled back before everyone turned to him, some of them looking either amused or turned on. “I’m Hanschen Rilow. Hi.” Hanschen said, obviously a little nervous but mostly looking confident.

Everyone started introducing themselves and asking him questions, and Ernst was just a blushing mess already while eating his strawberry’s. This hot boy was sitting really close to him, talking to all of his friends, and he felt immediately overwhelmed. Everyone went quiet though when Bobby Maler came over to their table. All of his friends hated him. 

“Hey, blondie.” Bobby said, making eye contact with Hanschen. “He doesn’t want to fuck you, Bobby. Go away.” Melchior said, and Bobby gave Melchior a look before walking away. “Who the hell was that?” Hanschen said, looking at Ernst and then at Melchior. “Some weirdo. He tried getting in Ernst’s pants during summer.” Melchior said, and Ernst blushed and let out a small whine.

“I-I didn’t let him.” “You would’ve, though.” Georg said, and Ernst groaned and threw his hands over his face. “Is everyone in this group gay?” Hanschen asked, and everyone laughed and nodded. “We’re all gay except for Anna, Georg and Wendla. They’re bi.” Melchior said, and Hanschen just nodded. “Fair.”

The subject changed and everyone kept talking with eachother, and lunch was over. “What do you have next?” Hanschen asked him, and Ernst stared at him for a few seconds before it hit him. “Oh! Uh.. Art.” “Oh, me too! Let’s go together.” Hanschen said, and they walked to their next class. That was the last class they had together, and at the end of the day Ernst was exhausted and wanted to go home, but couldn’t because there was a drama meeting.

He got to it late because he had to stop in his Latin class to pick up a form from the teacher, but thank god when he got there the meeting still didn’t start. He thought this meeting would probably hopefully take his mind off of Hanschen. But he saw him sitting close to the front of the audience, sitting next to someone who looked like Wendla and talking. Some of his friends were in theatre, but it seemed like Hanschen wanted to talk to Wendla the most. 

Ernst was a techie, and Wendla liked to act. Ilse did it too, but she liked doing crew more. Georg did crew, and Melchior acted. Melchior was talking to Georg on the stage with Max Von Trek, and Ilse was taking to the stage manager. Ernst sat in the seat next to Hanschen, and Hanschen and Wendla looked at him and smiled. “Oh my god, I should’ve known you do theatre. Do you do crew?” Hanschen asked, and Ernst nodded. 

“Yeah. I like costume department, but sometimes I do makeup.” Ernst said, and Hanschen just smiled and nodded. “Interesting. I act, so I’m obviously better than you.” Hanschen hummed and stuck his tongue out at him, and right after that the director told everyone to sit and get ready for the meeting to start. As the meeting went on, Ernst realized there was a high chance Hanschen wasn’t straight and that he was basically, at this point, fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!! kudos and comments are greatly appreciated :)  
> -  
> chapter updates don’t have a schedule, so i just post a new one whenever!


	3. Blondieboi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the kids add hanschen to their group chat later in the day, and ernst dies with all the new information coming out of hanschen.  
> ——  
> chat names=  
> blondieboi: hanschen  
> catholicdad: ernst   
> metaphorical: melchior  
> 20emoscene: moritz   
> immaturtle: georg   
> nuttynutnut: otto   
> fairybitch: wendla   
> emobitch: ilse   
> mothergay: martha   
> ottoisafurry: anna   
> thebestwin: thea   
> theaisahoe: melitta

When the drama meeting ended, Ernst sighed and ran a hand through his hair. All that information was slightly overwhelming, but he was sort of happy with the musical they would be doing, which was Mamma Mia. “Alright, Ernie. I’m staying with Ilse to help Max, okay? Text me.” Wendla said, hugging him tightly before going off to her girlfriend and Max on the stage. 

“Ernie, really?” Hanschen asked, walking next to Ernst with raised eyebrows. “Yeah.. everyone kinda just calls me that. I-I don’t mind.” Ernst said, fiddling with the sleeve of his sweater. “Well, if it makes you feel better, people at my old school called me Hansi. So.” Hanschen said, and Ernst just started laughing a little more louder than he should’ve, making Hanschen flush. “Hansi?! O-Oh my gosh, that’s so amazing.”

Hanschen nodded, then started walking with Ernst outside to their cars. “Hey, uh.. since like you’re my first friend here, can I have your number?” Ernst nodded, trying to contain his nervousness and he grabbed his phone, turned it on, and handed it to Hanschen. “That’s weird, since you said we couldn’t be friends since I was broke earlier.”

”Oh well.” Hanschen smiled and put in his information, then texted the number so Hanschen had Ernst’s. “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow?” Hanschen said, handing Ernst the phone. “Y-Yeah, yeah. Bye.” Ernst said, softly smiling before turning around and going to his car. Once he was safe inside he buckled himself in, turned on the radio, then let out a small screech. He couldn’t believe this angel of a boy just showed up and now he literally craves death.

He drove home bopping out to some Rent, and once he got home he saw his mom watching TV. “Hi, mom!” Ernst said, waving at her. “Hi, babe. I just ordered pizza for dinner, if that’s okay.” She said, and Ernst nodded before going upstairs. He dropped all of his stuff on the floor and kicked off his shoes, then flung onto his bed.

The first thing he did was pull out his phone, where he saw a text from someone under the contact name ‘Hansi Rilow’. Ernst immediately screeched, again, even though he knew it was coming.

 

**Hansi:** hi :)

**Me:** quick question do you wanna be in a gc with me and everyone else like we have one and it would be cool if you were in it.

**Me:** I’m rambling sorry 

**Hansi:** sure go ahead!

 

Ernst sighed and looked up at the ceiling, stressing over the fact his friends were probably gonna kill Ernst and ask Hanschen a bunch of personal questions. He didn’t even know why he asking, and he was obviously nervous in the text, but he couldn’t turn back now.

 

**catholicdad:** hi gays i got hanschens number and im gonna add him

**immaturtle:** hehehehe yay

**nuttynutnut:** babe PLEASE don’t hit on him please i beg he’s new 

**ottoisafurry:** i would hit on him but i have gorlfriend so

**metaphorical:** anna sweetie never say that ever again

**catholicdad:** guys shut up!!!

_***catholicdad added blondieboi to the chat*** _

**catholicdad:** welcome to hell

**mothergay:** what the fuck kind of name is that

**metaphorical:** says someone with the name mothergay 

**blondieboi:** uhhHhH kinda rude but hi!!

**20emoscene:** oh my god i think i found someone who uses extra exclamation marks too oh my god are we soulmates 

**metaphorical:** moritz babe I- 

**emobitch:** sorry im here but really melchior nobody wants to be soulmates with you 

**immaturtle:** the lesbian has a point

**mothergay:** the lesbians ALWAYS have a point

**20emoscene:** anyways, hi soulmate 

**blondieboi:** i don’t tolerate cheating so bye

**ottoisafurry:** oh my god king 

**emobitch:** hanschen do you know who everyone is 

**blondieboi:** yeah ernst told me we’re good

**metaphorical:** omg couple goals 

**thebestwin:** sorry im here hi 

**nuttynutnut:** where is ernst 

**emobitch:** probably choking on a dick

**mothergay:** having a panic attack

**fairybitch:** praying!! :)

**nuttynutnut:** forget i asked

**20emoscene:** is it bad timing if im saying I’m currently doing all 

**emobitch:** SMNDNSJDMSJSJSJSM

**blondieboi:** OH MY GOD????

**theaisahoe:** this is what i come back to 

**catholicdad:** I WAS GETTING PIZZA PLEASE STOP ATTACKING. ME DMDJDMDM

**immaturtle:** anyway lets ask hanschen come questions

**catholicdad:** please don’t scare him away

**metaphorical:** okay blondieboi tell us about yourself 

**blondieboi:** okay uh im 16 i have one younger brother my mom is deaf im bi and i have airpods and im better than melchior 

**emobitch:** oh I like him 

**metaphorical:** that was incredibly rude 

**ottoisafurry:** oh my god thank god you aren’t straight if you were we would’ve kicked you out

**20emoscene:** uh are you willing for a relationship because i will break up with melchior for you 

**fairybitch:** HAHAHAHAHAHA

**metaphorical:** MORITZ OH MY GOD DNEJJDSM

**catholicdad:** moritz i told you guys to not scare him off

**blondieboi:** i don’t want a relationship rn but thanks for the offer moritz im flattered

 

After that, Ernst shut off his phone and started to get changed out of his school clothes. He changed into a Dear Evan Hansen shirt and sweatpants. He’s one of the people that take morning showers, so he doesn’t feel too overwhelmed at night. He didn’t have any homework since it was the first day, so he just decided to go on his computer and watch YouTube right before Wendla called him.

”Hi, Ernie.” Wendla said, her voice smooth. Since they first became friends Ernst loved Wendla’s voice because it was so smooth. “Hey.” Ernst replied. “How’s everything? Are you surprised he’s bi?” Ernst hummed and laid back, his leg bouncing. “Mm.. not really. I kinda suspected it at the drama meeting.”

”Yeah. Now you just gonna win his heart over.” Wendla said, and Ernst giggled. “Yeah. Even though he’s not looking for a relationship.” “Well make him look for one. With you.” Wendla said with much determination in her voice, and Ernst laughed again. “Right. Thanks Wendy, I love you.” “I love you too, dork. Don’t do anything stupid.”

”I won’t.” Ernst said, then hung up before sitting back up. He went on Snapchat and found Hanschen’s username on his quick add through phone number, and he added him. Snapchat was a dangerous place, and Ernst never went on it. But having his crush added is a start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!! kudos and comments are greatly appreciated :))


	4. What a suprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a week later, moritz and otto go to support their boyfriends at lacrosse tryouts, and ernst tags along.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writers block is fun stuff but enjoy ;) next chapter is the fun stuff!!

About a week later, Melchior brought up that there was gonna be lacrosse tryouts the following day. The lacrosse coach arranged for practices to be different days than drama, so drama kids could join. A lot of drama kids like the sport, what could you say?

“I’m trying out. Is anyone else?” Georg said, where only Melchior rose his hand. Ilse was gonna try out for girls lacrosse, but that was later in the week. “Well, me and Moritz are gonna go to support you guys.” Otto said, and Moritz just groaned and rested his head on Melchior’s shoulder who laughed.

Hanschen was sitting next to Ernst, scrolling through Twitter. Ernst found out about Hanschen’s love for photography, and dyed hair. Apparently Hanschen’s natural color was brown, but he’s dyed it blonde for a while so he just stuck with that. Ernst loved it. “Are you Homs try out?” Ernst asked, turning his head to look at Hanschen and tuning out everyone around them.

“Mm. I might. It’s not really my thing, though.” Hanschen said, still looking down at his phone. Ernst nodded before turning back, continuing to eat his food. Once lunch was over, everyone said bye before Moritz and Otto came over and started to talk to Ernst. “Do you wanna come to the tryouts with us? We’re probably gonna go eat after with Melchi and Georg.” Otto said, Moritz just standing there smiling.

Ernst was about to decline, then he remembered there was a possibility Hanschen was gonna be there, running and looking hot, so Ernst nodded. “Yeah, I guess.” Ernst said, then the boys smiled and said bye before walking off. 

The rest of the day went by pretty fast, and so did the next school day. The only thing on his mind pretty much the whole time was probably seeing Hanschen tryout after school, and that just made him happy. The day was a little cold, so he kept his sweater on but wore his black baseball cap from the campus store.

He had a yellow hydro flask water bottle with stickers on it from his favorite shows and musicals, and he tapped on it and kept his head down as he, Moritz, and Otto walked to the bleachers. There weren’t a lot of people watching, so they sat towards the front. Ernst put his water bottle down next to him and pulled out his phone, a little too flustered to look up and see if Hanschen was there.

“Ernst, look up.” Otto said from next to him, and when he did he saw the boys out there. Talking to Melchior and Georg was Hanschen, in his athletic clothes and looking somewhat sweaty from warming up. “O-Oh my god. Oh my god, I have to leave.” Ernst mumbled, shaking his head and flushing. He really didn’t know how to act.

Moritz groaned from next to Otto, then Otto bumped their shoulders together. “It’s okay. Breathe.” Otto said, then the tryouts started so the boys started paying more attention. Ernst kept his eyes on Hanschen, but not too openly. Hanschen ran and panted, and at one point when he drank water and it spilled down his chin Ernst got highly heated, even though it wasn’t hot outside.

Once the tryouts were over, Otto insisted they go onto the field to say hi and walk to their cars together. So when they walked down onto the field, Ernst kept fiddling with his sleeve. “Hi, guys.” Otto said, then Ernst smiled at them. Melchior and Moritz hugged and Otto and Georg just talked, so Ernst walked over to Hanschen.

“I would hug you, but you’re sweaty, so..” Ernst said, and Hanschen laughed before taking a sip of his water. “It’s fine. Are you going out to eat with them? Melchior invited me.” Hanschen asked, looking down at him with a smirk. Ernst hated that smirk, because it made him feel so small. And really, he was.

“Yeah. Do you need a ride?” Ernst said, then he internally hit himself for offering because he knew he wouldn’t be able to pay attention. “If you insist.” Hanschen said, poking Ernst’s shoulder before walking over to grab his bag. All the boys left in their cars to go meet at the diner, and in Ernst’s car with Hanschen in the passengers seat, Hanschen went on about some stuff Ernst didn’t even understand. 

“Like.. oh my god. His mind is just so powerful!” Hanschen said, his hand flaring before he took another sip out of his water. “Hans, I kinda lost track of what you’re saying 5 minutes ago.” Ernst said, stifling a giggle as Hanschen groaned and looked over at him with a look that Ernst saw out of the corner of his eye.

“Okay, listen. Shakespeare himself was a GOD and he did so many good things that people don’t appreciate him for. And, by the way, his poems are so amazing. He was probably a hot ass dude, too!” Hanschen continued rambling, and at that point Ernst lost it and started laughing. “Please stop, I’m serious!”

“Hanschen.. p-please don’t take this seriously but y-you’re a hot drama kid who plays sports going on a-about Shakespeare. Do you understand how f-freaking weird that is?” Ernst asked, just receiving a groan from Hanschen. Right as that happened, he pulled into the parking lot of the diner. They got out and walked inside together, where they saw everyone at a table.

They sat next to eachother and said hi, then Melchior had the AUDACITY to say something stupid. “So, Hanschen, how was it?” Melchior asked, receiving different looks from everyone. “What? The tryouts?” Hanschen asked, his eyebrows raised. “Oh, no! When Ernst sucked you off before you got here.”

“JESUS CHRIST.” Ernst screeched, hiding his face in his hands. Moritz just hit his arm and Georg and Otto just burst into laughter while Melchior smirked. Ernst didn’t see this, but Hanschen’s face flushed and he just laughed. “I just went rambled about Shakespeare the whole time, I swear!” “That’s gay language.”

Ernst looked up and groaned, and they all ordered and the meal went on with jokes and boy stuff, except the fact none of them were straight so it was slightly different. When it ended and they all said bye, Ernst gave Hanschen a ride home. 

On the ride they just talked about some things in life, like what they wanted to do when they got to college or what certain things meant to them. When they got to Hanschen’s house, he realized it was pretty nice and two stories. “Well, thanks for the ride. Today was a lot of fun.” Hanschen said, his eyes averting to the sky, which was a pretty pink sunset.

“Uh, yeah.. I’ll see you tomorrow?” Ernst asked, his cheeks turning a little red. Hanschen looked at him and started into his eyes for a second, then he nodded before mumbling a soft “Bye” and sliding out of the car and to his house.

Ernst sat there and made sure Hanschen got inside before driving off. His heart was beating way too quickly than it should’ve been, and on the whole ride home he was thinking and dying. What was all of that about? Why did he leave so suddenly? 

When he got home and took a shower, and even got into bed, he kept thinking about it. He decided it was probably just Hanschen being weird or feeling sick because of the long day, and decided to rest. But he still was confused.


	5. It’s time for a celebration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> there’s some news about the lacrosse team, and because of that news melchior decides it would be pretty cool to hold a party for their friend group.  
> —————  
> sorry this chapter is a little short! next chapter will be long though, so prepare yourselves folks

A few days later, on a Thursday, there was an announcement on the morning speakers that the boys lacrosse team would be posted in about an hour from then. Hanschen turned to Melchior with a large smile, who smiled back, then Hanschen turned to Ernst. “After class do you wanna come look at the lost with me?” Hanschen said, and Ernst nodded.

“Sure. Melchior, are you coming?” Ernst asked, turning to Melchior to avoid any more eye contact with Hanschen before he got too nervous. “I have a test next period, so I’m good. Take a picture of the list and send it to me, though.” Melchior said, then Ernst and Hanschen nodded at the same time before paying attention. 

After class, Hanschen stood up and waited by Ernst’s desk so he could grab his things. Everyone only had 5 minutes in-between classes, and they had to go by the boys locker room which was pretty much across campus from where they were now. Neither of them seemed to care though, because that meant extra time out of class.

“I’m nervous, not gonna lie.” Hanschen said as they walked out of class, but keeping his chin up as they walked around. “There’s no reason to be, you were one of the best people trying out.” Ernst said, trying to desperately cheer up Hanschen. 

“Says the boy who doesn’t give a shit about sports.” Hanschen said, letting out a soft laugh as he heard Ernst gasp. “Okay, that’s totally untrue. I can just tell you were!” 

Hanschen laughed again, this time a little louder, then gently bumped their shoulders together. “Thanks, Ernst. Do you do any sports?” Hanschen asked, probably trying to calm his nerves by changing the subject away from him. “Mm. Not really. I did do swimming back in freshman year, but I focus too much on theatre.”

“Fair enough. You know, one time last year, I played Billy in Carrie and had a thing with the guy who played Tommy? It was weird.” Hanschen said, making Ernst blush a little and laugh. “Must be nice. Everyone talks about me hookimg up with guys all the time but the only thing I’ve ever really done is almost kiss Bobby Maler. Thank god I didn’t.”

Hanschen gasped and looked over at Ernst, his eyebrows raised and obviously amused. “So you’re telling me you’ve never even kissed a boy?! It’s junior year, dude!” “Okay? I’m sorry?” Ernst said a little defensively, making Hanschen scoff and shake his head. “No, it’s just like.. that makes me feel like a hoe.” 

“No! I-It’s just nobody likes me enough. Or wants to. It’s fine you hook up with people.” Ernst said, his hands flaring around as he talked, once again. “Okay.. it’ll happen one day, Ernst. Hopefully.” Hanschen snickered, which made Ernst just groan.

The bell rung right as they got to the locker room, where a few boys were just walking away. Hanschen saw the list, then he found his name on the Varisty team, along with Melchior. “Oh my god! I got it!” Hanschen cheered, then he hugged Ernst so tight while they were both laughing in happiness that Ernst was slightly picked off the ground.

“I knew you could do it, H-Hans!” Ernst laughed, poking Hanschen’s shoulder as the other boy took a picture of the list and sent it to their group chat. Once he did, he looked back at Ernst with a large dorky smile before gesturing with him to walk back to their next class, which was in the same building.

Hanschen hummed and looked up, then back down at Ernst. “You’re so nice, you know that? It’s like.. too nice.” Ernst furrowed his eyebrows before shrugging, then he fiddled with the sleeve of his sweater. “Eh. I like being nice. It’s like my brand.” “I guess that means being a hoe is my brand, then.” Hanschen said, making Ernst burst into laughter for no reason. 

As Ernst was laughing, Hanschen got a call from Melchior. As he answered, he put the call on speaker so Ernst could hear Melchior too. “Oh my god, dude! We’re varisty lacrosse players!” Melchior cheered, and Hanschen laughed. “Yeah. I feel kinda bad that Georg didn’t get on the team, though.”

“Georgs a little bitch, don’t feel bad.” Melchior said, making Ernst nod and Hanschen just laugh. “Fair. So how are we gonna celebrate?” Hanschen asked, and Melchior hummed for a few seconds before saying an idea a little too loudly. “How about a party?! But just our friend group.” “Yeah, that sounds cool.” Hanschen agreed, and Ernst thought for a minute.

“Alright. We’ll talk at lunch.” Melchior said, then Hanschen hung up. “So, will you do a party?” Hanschen asked, then Ernst shrugged before nodding. “Probably. The only party I went to I got drunk off my shit, so. Hopefully this time it isn’t as bad.” 

“Right. I’m gonna go, but I’ll see you later.” Hanschen said, waving to Ernst before walking up the stairs to his classroom. When Ernst got I’m class, he apologized to the teacher before sitting down. He was crazily nervous for the party, which was probably gonna be on Saturday. That’s usually when Melchior did his parties.


	6. If this is heaven, I hope to be here forever.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Melchior throws a party with their friend group to celebrate him and Hanschen getting on the lacrosse team, and obviously some shit goes down.  
> ——  
> Finally a chapter from Hanschen’s POV ;)

On Saturday at 6 pm, Melchior told Hanschen to come over to help him set up since the party was supposed to go from 8 to 1. Hanschen was standing in front of his mirror, 15 minutes before he had to leave for Melchiors house, debating on wearing a tight white shirt or a regular blue one. 

His outfit consisted of black doc martens and black ripped jeans, but he didn’t know how to finish it off. He just decided to go with the white shirt, and once he was done he combed a brush through his hair, put on his cologne and glasses, then grabbed his stuff before leaving. 

As he played some Les Mis in the car, he thought of things that were gonna happen tonight. He was really excited Ernst was gonna be there, because, if he had to admit, he liked Ernst. A lot. Since he first saw him, really. It was weird, though, because unlike a lot of the other people he liked, he didn’t want to hurt him. He actually wanted to be with him and like.. be romantic, almost. Like actually love him. Which was weird for him, but he didn’t exactly mind. 

He pulled into Melchior’s driveway and walked to the door and knocked, and when Melchior opened the door he let Hanschen inside with a hum and a smile. “Hey, blondieboi.” Melchior said, obviously with a tease in his voice. “Hi, metaphorical. That’s such a goddamn stupid name.” Yeah, I know.”

For the next hour, they just talked while they started taking out the drinks. They finished around 7:15, so they just sat on the couch while Melchior texted Moritz to see if he could get here any earlier than 8, which meant Hanschen would have to third wheel for a little. 

“Hey, you and Moritz are really cute together, by the way.” Hanschen said, and Melchior put down his phone and smiled at Hanschen before slightly nodding. “Thanks. So.. is there anyone you’re thinking about getting with? I can make it happen, I promise you. I’m like the Cupid in the friend group.” 

As Melchior said that, Hanschen got a little nervous. “Uh.. let me think” He did’nt have to think about who he wanted to get set up with, because he already knew, but he wanted to think about him. He loved how Ernst blushed and fidgeted with his sleeves on his sweater, and how Ernst would talk about something that meant a lot to him his eyes would light up or how when he talked about something sad or something bad that happened to him, he would look down and shuffle his feet. 

“Um.. Ernst? He doesn’t like me though, so. I don’t know. And I don’t even know him that well.” Hanschen wanted to go on, but Melchior’s eyebrows raised and he held a hand in front of Hanschen’s face so he couldn’t continue before he himself started. 

“Dude. Are you stupid?!” Melchior said, groaning before throwing his hands in the air. “I-“ “Don’t even say anything. Of course you are. I’ll make it happen, I promise.” Melchior continued, then he hit Hanschen’s shoulder with a laugh. 

“Just know that the poor boy’s never had his first kiss before and if you hurt him, I will literally end your life.” Melchior said, then shook hands with Hanschen as Hanschen turned pink. There was a knock on the door, and Melchior stood up to answer it. There stood Moritz, Martha and Anna. Melchior let them in, then they all hugged and sat in the living room. 

Hanschen sat on a chair with Martha sitting on the floor with Anna in her lap, and Moritz and Melchior were cuddling on the couch. “So, me and Hanschen were talking, and I found out he has a little boy crush on Ernst Robel.” “NO FUCKING WAY!” Martha screamed, along with Anna just yelling, and Moritz gasped and clapped. 

“Oh my god! Did you tell him if he hurts Ernst everyone’s gonna kill him?” Moritz asked, and everyone laughed, except for Hanschen who nervously laughed, and Melchior nodded. “Good.” Moritz said after. They continued to talk, then once more people showed up the lights shut off and the cool colorful lights cams on, along with the music and red solo cups with scribbled names on them.

Hanschen was talking to Thea and Ilse in the living room, where mostly everyone was, and he kept looking around for Ernst. He saw the front door open, and in walked Wendla and Ernst. Hanschen inhaled deeply before excusing himself and going to find Melchior.

He found him in front of the kitchen making out with Moritz against a wall, so he just sighed and turned around to go talk to Ernst. Hanschen took a sip from his beer, then he walked over to Ernst, who was talking to Ilse and Wendla. 

“Hey, guys.” Hanschen said, receiving smiles from Ernst and Ilse but Wendla hugged him tightly and pecked his cheek. “Hi, Hans. Are you drunk yet?” Ilse said, and Hanschen just shook his head. “I only have beer. I can handle beer.” Hanschen said, taking another sip as Ilse held up her cup of vodka. “I just have sprite, like Ernst. We’re too pure to get drunk.” Wendla said, and Hanschen and Ilse laughed as Wendla groaned and Ernst flushed.

“It,s not that bad. C’mon.” Hanschen held out his cup to Wendla, who just shook her head. He then held it out to Ernst, and Ernst took a sip before handing it back and coughing. “Nope. Not my thing.” Ernst said, and Hanschen hummed. The music suddenly turned off and the lights turned on, then Melchior was standing on the couch in the living room, waving his arms. 

“Hello, gays! Everyone come sit in a circle so we can play our annual 7 minutes in heaven!” Melchior said, and everyone went to sit in a circle. Hanschen sat in-between Anna and Moritz, and Ernst sat a few people away from him in-between Melchior and Thea. 

“You guys know the rules, but I’ll repeat. Everyone has to go, but if you’re taken and you get called to go with someone else or you just don’t want to, you don’t have to.” Melchior said, then he placed an empty beer bottle in the middle. “Who’s first?” Wendla asked, and Ilse just nudged her. “You.”

Wendla spun the bottle, and it landed on Thea. They laughed and stood up, then went into the closet. Once they were done, they came out just laughing before sitting back down. “Alright, Thea. Your turn.” Melchuor said, and Thea spun and it landed on Ernst, which made Hanschen heat up and get a little nervous, even though he knew Ernst was gay.

Ernst shrugged and they went in the closet, and came out with Ernst’s arm around Thea’s waist. “Like we’d ever believe you guys would hook up. Ernst’s turn.” Otto said, making Thea throw up her middle finger at him as Ernst spun the bottle.

Ernst spun it, and it seemed like the bottle spun in slow motion before landing on Hanschen. Both of the boys’ faces heated up, and they entered the closet together. It was small, so even since they were leaned against either side of the walls, they were still close. 

“Uh.. hi.” Ernst mumbled, and Hanschen suddenly thanked god that the closet was pitch black. “Hi. Can I-I tell you something?” Hanschen said, and he just heard Ernst mumble a soft “sure.” “Uh.. I like you. And I’m stupid for that, because I know you don’t like me.”

It was silent for a little, probably a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity. The whole time, through the party, Hanschen was preparing himself to say that. “O-Oh. Uh. Me too.” Ernst said, and Hanschen just giggled, which made Ernst giggle. 

“Okay.” Hanschen said, and he just felt Ernst wrap his arms around Hanschen’s neck, which made Hanschen wrap his arms around Ernst’s waist. They hugged for another few seconds, before Hanschen said something really stupid. He was probably gonna regret it. 

“C-Can I kiss you?” Hanschen asked, and Ernst just said “yeah” real softly. Hanschen gently connected their lips in a soft kiss, and he felt Ernst hesitantly kiss back. As it went on, the kiss went deeper and more passionate, and Ernst’s hand ended up in Hanschen’s hair and Hanschen’s hand ended up on Ernst’s jawline. 

They pulled away for air a few times, and Hanschen realized this was the most genuine kiss he’s ever had. Ernst tasted like a mix of soda and beer, but he smelt like mint. And his lips were really soft, and Hanschen just wanted to melt. 

They were interrupted by a pounding on the door, and they both immediately pulled away out of breath. Hanschen let out a small laugh before opening up the door, and when everyone saw their flushed faces and messy hair, they all whooped and whistled. 

They sat down at their designated spots, and the game continued with Hanschen passing and letting Anna spin, then he grabbed his cup and walked outside to the backyard. He finished his cup and threw it away, then he sat on the porch and looked up at the sky.

Hanschen came out here to breathe, and just try to calm his nerves, but his train of thought was totally ruined when he heard the back door open. Someone sat next to him, and when Hanschen looked, it was Ernst. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I should’nt have come out here.” Ernst mumbled, his cheeks flushing impossibly darker, and he moved to stand up. 

Hanschen grabbed his hand and held it tightly, then shook his head. “No, please. I wanna talk.” “Okay.” Ernst mumbled, looking down at their hands like Hanschen was before looking at Hanschen so he knew he could talk. “Okay, um.. I like you. I-I already told you that, but uh, yeah. You’re just so nice to me and I know we just met but I just really, really, really like you. 

And I want to go on a date with you, or something. Like we can get to know eachother, or something like that. And do cute stuff. If you don’t want to t-that’s totally fine, I totally understand that, I just want you to know.” Hanschen said, then he let out a deep breath like he just took the world off of his chest. 

“Okay. I would really like that, actually.” Ernst said, turning to face Hanschen and smile. Once they made eye contact, Ernst connected their lips this time in a kiss, a few seconds long, then pulled away. “Do you wanna do lunch tomorrow? And we can just hang out somewhere after?” Hanschen asked, and Ernst smiled brightly before nodding.

So, after that, the party went on and it was time to leave. Hanschen offered to drive Ernst home, and Ernst happily accepted. As they drove to Ernst’s house, Ernst played some Rent at a low volume and they just talked about some things that they knew couples would need to know about eachother, but they never brought that up. 

Once they got to Ernst’s house, Ernst shut off the music and unbuckled before turning to Hanschen and hugging him again, then leaving a long and slightly passionate kiss on his lips. “Tonight was really fun, thanks for taking me.” Ernst said, and Hanschen nodded. “Of course. I’ll text you when I get home, okay?” Hanschen said, and Ernst nodded before sliding out of the car. 

Hanschen made sure Ernst got inside before he drove off, turning back on Rent and singing along happily to it. He was so happy, and now Rent was gonna remind him of how much he likes Ernst and how much it reminds him of the boy.

Hanschen got home, and when he walked inside he realized nobody was awake. He went upstairs and into his room and put on a blue shirt and gray sweatpants, then shut off the lights and laid in bed before he pulled out his phone to text Ernst.

 

Me: tonight was a lot of fun :)) where do you wanna go tmrw?

Ernst: how about panera by the beach? then after we can just walk around and stuff?

Me: of course! do you want me to pick you up around 1?

Ernst: sure :) ill see you tomorrow 

Me: okay, good night <3

Ernst: goodnight!!

 

Hanschen shut off his phone and made sure to set a timer for 11, then he laid back and stared at the ceiling before turning on his side and shutting his eyes. He slept very happily because of how happy he was, and he was so ready for tomorrow.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! kudos and comments are greatly appreciated :)  
> i don’t have a posting schedule, so new chapters will be up whenever!


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